-I'm just keep working on cinema4D. As on my research, I agree that the idea is easy (I mean it's not really easy but more important thing is embodiments. ) and I need to spend more time on experimenting. Actually, I would say that this pandemic situation really enables me to find a way of self-teaching. I thought it would be so hard learning something and improve my ability during this period and spent much time on just watching other artists' interviews and doing nothing. And I found many artists were used to self-teaching. That why I could start learning cinema4D by myself with youtube. I was shocked to see a bunch of free tutorials and realize I could've started this things earlier.

-I don't have any final image yet, so I'm planning to spend all my weekend  on it. I'm really enjoying making random things now, and I will find it's relation with my PPP. I know if I started earlier, I could have done something. However, it was unusual but meaningful experience for me.

-Anyway, This is my plan for tomorrow:

1. Keep making things with C4D and other Adobe tools
2. Complete my evaluation
3. Do research things if I have time to

-I made a 2d outcome today. I just wanted to use some photos I took, and tried to mixed it up with found images I already had. I'm afraid that I don't know what the final form of the work would be though, I would like to experience and think more about not only the project I'm doing now but also the theme that I wanna get in to.

-I also started to make something in cinema4D. I think 3D stuffs look quite interesting. It looks perfect and flawless at the first but people would add more texture and effects to make it more realistic. I know it is kinda random, but this process really reminds me of Plato's idea things. (this is not a reason why I made this column structure.)

-While I was working, I thought about the difference of processed image and raw, lo-fi image. It's also an extended question from my previous thoughts about original and fake. Generally, processed images are used for a purpose such as advertising, giving information and etc.. whenever I see perfectly designed image, I feel like I'm watching a perfect fake, which is regarded as more believable and authorized something than realistic but low quality image. I will research and write about it more.

How have existing cultures have been interpreted and re-consumed these days?

I grew up watching a lot of Japanese contents containing some of western cultures. Because of this background, I was used to the western culture that have been interpreted by eastern people (especially Japanese) more than the real one. I thought it was kind of weird to use and consume other cultures without any deep understanding. This sort of re-consuming of the culture could be found in every part of culture industries including game, book, music and fashion. 

This does happen not only between two different cultures, but also in single culture as time goes by. Culture accumulates and transformed over the time and sometimes it seems almost resurrected. For example, Lolita culture shows how culture moves and be consumed across the time and area. 

Lolita (ロリータ・ファッション, rorīta fasshon) is a fashion subculture from Japan that is highly influenced by Victorian clothing and styles from the Rococo period.

This fashion style was simply started in Japan but now, there are people who engage on Lolita fashion in western countries. It became another cultural mass regardless of it's original. I can not explain exactly what I have felt, I think my interest is about the difference between other cultures and misunderstanding between them. When something moves across different time and space, the cultural difference causes sort of leftover that has particular feeling from an original.

Even though I made something, I still don't know how can I keep working on this project without any tutorial or lectures. It was quite hard to figure out what I really want to make and learn through the project this time. I have just tried organizing my thoughts and my interests. I found it is not easy to make full video without elaborating my interests. so I will try to find something by writing down something and keep working on physical drawings and 2D graphic works instead of video making. 

first of all, I think I need to reconsider about my proposal. I said I want to explore the accumulation, emotions and also the mutual affection between reality and fake. It is true that Ive had an interest about how internet and the life in internet have affected on real life and real art. I know it is hard to divide real and fake anymore, but I believe that there's a power of the images(I think the word 'image' includes text and something more abstract things.) internet and emotions that could be spread by an image. I just want to understand what it is.

1. Cultural aggregation on internet 

2. The way how exist cultures are interpreted, duplicated, transformed and consumed

3. What images are considered authoritative?

4. how emotions are shared through the internet? what makes it possible?

I made a video about apples and old recipe.

To be honest, I wasn't able to concentrate on the project for last few weeks. I felt like everything I planned have been messed up and I was really confused about what I can do in this situation. Even though I have learned how to manage my time and plan my project by myself through this course, I haven't done a lot for this project. 

I thought I have to make something even if I couldn't do it well, that's why I started to make this video. 'Accumulation' this is a keyword of my project and I thought it could be explained by the idea of apple. When I was in high school, I heard of the entry exam from Seoul national university that said "draw three different apples in human history." I felt it could demonstrate my idea of human history and accumulation. By simply imagining of apple, so many stories came in to my mind including Newton, Adam and eve, Snow White, and many painters. This was really interesting that people can imagine so many different things from one simple material like apple.

I am keep wondering what makes something important than others. 

I had a tutorial today and I will list up the things that I have to change and improve during this week

1. Sketchbook

-I did use sketchbook to organize my thought and visualize my abstract idea though, Tutor told me she couldn't catch the things that I wanted to show through my works. I think it is because of the lack of information on my sketchbook and everything seems not related. I will use sketchbook more than before, and will record all my working process to show my purpose. I know I do work in kinda confusing way and I need to explain it well.

2. Experiment-college and video making

-As I decided yesterday, I will start my project on a new page, which means I've got to do more and more work to make an outcome. I change a plan and get some new inspirations during the work 

I decided to change the entire plan for this project. I always work without plan or something, but I realized it will not work on this project because I don't have a suggested theme or material this time. So I'm going to make own plan first and to start research again. I feel Its like starting at the first point but I believe that the previous research and experiment help me a lot and gave me inspirations. I'm plan to make something relating with my recent work. Idea of accumulations and human culture, also the concern about authority of the image. 

I have tried to use 3d tools like 3d Maya or cinema 4d and I think part 3 could be a great opportunity to practice more and find a program that is matched for my style. And I think the final outcome would be a mixture of 3D graphics I made ( I don't think that could be a high-quality but I want to try!), footages, and some other visual materials. I should be able to be a part of the video. I think I'm little late than others, but It was necessary to have a time to think more and figure out what I really want to make for me. I'm going to start to make next week, and I'm going to do final research and make more detailed plan for making process. I planed to go to Brighton this weekend and I think It could be a good chance to take a footages and have a fresh eyes. I will record further changes or research during this weekend as well.

-list up

Reflection

Today, I had a time to make some development on my project. Actually I'm afraid that I don't really have at least a rough idea of my video work yet. I mean I have had some idea of my own work, but something has disturbed me recently. That is kinds of technical issues, which I have concerned through this whole foundation course. I know how to use adobe editing programs, but it doesn't mean I fully understand the function of them and be used to use it. I'm kinda worrying about lack of my technical ability, because I have wanted more advanced outcome. I have done quite lots of research in reading week, and feel like I found my interests in terms of theme or concepts, but it's still hard to choose medium 

Research Seminar

Today I shared my research with my peers. It was a great opportunity to have a chat with who has similar concern on a work. I showed a journal that I have read before, and also showed some film I have watched last week. our group was 'digital' and we have a chat about the relationship between virtual reality and the real life as well as digital self and ego. Actually our group was too small to have more diverse point of view, so we just talked about technical issues that we have met and they suggest me to try to make virtual reality by my self. I have thought of that, but I was kinda afraid of lack of my ability, but I think part 3 could be a chance to just try something more complicated or something I haven't done before. 

Also today was ppp and Lux final deadline, and I was able to submit all of my work today. I have set up my workflow today, and I'm going to upload what I have done during reading week and last week. I did quite lots of research then I realized It is so important to prove it on my workflow. My weekly plan is : upload more on workflow and make initial experimental work and also do more sketchbook development! 

I have thought about the theme of this project. As a previous work, Song of the Forgotten people, I'm going to choose one material like 'song' or 'mysterious flower' and to build up some fake narratives and history of them. It should be from every kinds of pre-exist information around the world, and also cyber-world (internet). Recently I was impressed by sorts of classic video games and the mutual influence between real world and virtual world, physical body and ego-internet. I went an artist talking session 'Ask before you bite', which led me to think more about the theme of mine. I'm still feeling messy, so I'm going to do drawing more and also I think I have to write down something by a text, to organize my thoughts and ideas. I usually work kinda messy way and think that is more helpful to generate creative things, but now I think I need to practice more efficient way to work further from abstract ideas I have.

I started to draw something on my sketchbook today. Sometimes I feel like every idea is mixed up in my mind and It is kinda hard to organize. When I feel that kind of difficulty, I used to draw a lot. I believe that drawing is the most intuitive way to express my thoughts and feelings. 

My drawings are really similar to a collage, but sometimes I prefer to draw more because I can arrange the form or color of the original image to the way I want, but It can also shows a sort of rough feeling that image have. Actually I don't usually use a vivid color in a work, but I just wanted to develop my work in a different way this time.

Today I went to British Museum for research. Actually I went there just to feel the atmosphere. I have had interests in old stuffs after the project 'LUX'. And wonder why people still want to go Museums and see what human have made. I know people usually visit museums for educational reasons, but I really want to know what they really feel in front of historical heritages if they do not have any background knowledge or something. We know these things are valuable because we've got education about history and culture, but if we don't then what we gonna think? this is a quite far question from the main theme of my project though, I just want to record all my questionary during the project this time. 

After visiting museum today, I also did a research about Celtic musics and thought about the impact of human's emotion on artworks. As an artist, I think we should care both formation of art and emotional parts of them. It's hard to write in a short sentences though, it is definitely clear that artworks have a level of quality. I will keep wonder about them!

After PPP tutorial, I noted some of things I have to change. I mentioned randomness in my proposal, but after chat, I could realize that my work is not really random, but kinda intentional. So, now I'm going to make a daily plan and follow that to fix my ppp and take more research within the theme I selected. My project is mainly about accumulated materials all around the internet as well as the real world, which make me feel something different from usual. I will read some journals on e-flux. And I also want to explore about contemporary information and it's relationship with creating narratives and stories. So after the school, what I am going to do from now is

1. make more clear what my project is about.

2. read some journals, and have a think what my outcome is going to be (materials, medium.. etc)

3. think through drawings and collage on sketchbook

4. work to finish final ppp until the deadline

And as the project is processing, I will record and write down the changes and reflections on workflow. 

Self reflection after research week

During this reading week, I have watched several films from various time and place.